ugh. so i totally grossed myself out this past weekend. sometimes i let my ultimate warrior she-ra guard down and end up getting effed. this isn't a post about why i just spent the past 4 days rocking the same stanky clothes with unwashed hair in my crumb infested nest of a bed, but what rousted me outta it. (and sadly, forced me to change my underwear). let's call this my 27-something-slump. but you know what? fuck that noise. i'm better than them demons that haunt me (both imaginative and unfortunately, real). so ima rise, just like niki manaj (if you get that reference than you rule. weezy 4 lyfe).
today, after a slew of unanswered text messages beeped me to life, i finally rolled over my slumbering kit kit and reached for my laptop to plug into the virtual world. and there it was in my in-box, 'new girl talk drops today - for free.' whaaaaat? totally unexpected. it'd been 2+ years since 'feed the animals' dropped - i don't remember exactly when it dropped, 'cept i was still living with mike, who surely did not share my sentiment for booty shaking mash-up retardation. 'feed the animals' is still on heavy rotation, to this day, whenever it is i need a swift kick in the ass to get ready for the morning or wake the fuck up. so when i read this email, i carelessly tossed my laptop to the side and stumbled outta my room for the first time in what felt like years - (seriously, ya'll, i'm pretty sure i morphed into one of those creepy bat dwelling critters that never see the light of day after not leaving my apartment for 3+days after something like 80 consecutive hours of slumber). i ran to my living room comp and in dismay, attempted said download of girl talk's latest release, 'all day' time and time again.
just like every other rotten hipster in the universe.
turns out illegal-art's servers were in such heavy demand some shit down the way crashed - prohibiting my stanky ass noon dance party. after about an hour or so, i finally mcgyver'd that shit and found an alternate link. (want it? just google 'girl talk AND all day AND mediafire' yer welcome). and i gotta say, that while girl talk was inspiration enough for me to get the fuck up and quit rotting away in girly-god-i-hate-boys-and-life-what have you, i'm just now, 7+ hours getting the chance to rock the album in completion for the first time. i'm sure a full up review will be up in the near future - but for now, it's safe to say this shit is rad as fuck. 'tenderness' + 'can i getta?' omfg. luv.
but i gotta say, the theme of today, girl talk, is my fucking savior. my boo lisa, like a fucking saint, swooped down from the comforts of lincoln square down to my dirty dwelling to cheer my ass up. nonjudgemental. nonbiased. pure girly power. we rocked some bigass fucking burgers complete with waffle fries. went to kmart where we pretty much cleaned out the beauty product section. rocked more junk food from jewel than the homies from half baked. indulged in facials, cukes on the eyeballs and all, and rocked strawberries & champagne, topped off with half a can of redi-whip with the comfort of girly classics clueless and pretty in pink in the background. man. i thought i was bummed out - at least a rich boy didn't invite me to prom and then take it back!!!! (seriously, that movie is kinda rough to watch. most rigid and awkward concluding kiss finale of all time. i'm glad i aint' molly ringwald, that shit looked sick). and man, at least i didn't fall for a gay boy and then fall in love with my step brother! talk about dramance!!
anyway. girl shit rulez. both solid homegirls and dance party shit. im listening to a mash-up of big boi's 'shutterbugg' and portishead's 'dummy' right now. and jezus christo. this is my shit. it sure as hell beats listening to gayngs on repeat with eternal sunshine of the spotless mind on the background.
as a one genius mark hoppus once stated, 'well i guess this is growing up.'
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