bodytalk pt.1

I found it. The new robyn ep, that is. 7 songs, 25 minutes of pure pop princess prowess. But, I gotta say, as much booty shakin' is and will commence to the delectable single "Dancing on my Own," Body Talk Pt. 1 is no self-titled 05/08 release. I know homegirl's got 2 more albums in the works for 2010 and I totes respect the fact that she wants to push out her jams as quickly as possible vs hoarding it for one album at the end of the year, but the fact remains that this is a mere flirtation of a dance party.

Album opener, "Don't Fucking Tell Me What to Do" is catchy, but is more club-trance-trash than what girly's capable of. It's a dark and computerized 4 minute rant, "My drinking's killing me, my label's killing me, my pms is killing me, etc etc" clinched at the end with a robotic demand, "Don't fucking tell me what to do - do." I played about ten seconds of it in front of my boyfriend who just looked at me, "What the fuck is this?" Even I couldn't defend it -- and dudes, this is Robyn. FAIL - 1.5/5 stars - I can't completely hate on Robyn, after all, but dayumn.

Moving along to track number two, the single "Fembot" which I guess is some sort of "Hey I'm 30 years old now and I know I'm supposed to have kids and a husband but guess what I don't!" rebellion jam. I read that, anyway, in various interviews, but I don't really get it. It just reminds me of those gross Svedka vodka robot sluts in their CTA ads. "I've got. Some news for you. Fembots. Got feelings too." Ok, girl, I feel your beats - but you're not really making loads of sense. But this jam is dancey and I'm digging all the electronicy flavor, so I'll give this track 3/5 stars for its mad drunken danceparty potential.

Song number 3 is it. This is Robyn's "With Every Heartbeat" and "Be Mine!" multiplied. The beats are kinda cheesy late 90's power synth pop Roller Den type of shit, but they're the perfect pace and ideal bed for her girly angst desperate cries, "I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her - oooooh. I'm right over here, why can't you see me---oooooh. I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home - oooooooh, I keep dancing on my own." Sounds like the ideal song for a tampon commercial or Oxygen promo, right? WELL MAYBE IT IS. butttttt, it's soooo fucking fun to dance to and prance about in my bra and panties. Shower scream along girl anthem, yep. It's got all the "Man I hate you so much right now cute boy - but only because I love you so much, why am I beating myself up over this when we'll never be together"ness of "Be Mine!" but also the dancey demandingness of "With Every Heartbeat." God. I'm such a loser. But if you listen to this track, you'll get it. If you don't have a vagina, you'll wish you had one. "Dancing on My Own" scores a 10/5. I have a feeling my neighbors will be getting very sick of this jam pumping out my bedroom window this summer, BUT I DON'T GIVE A SHIT. I KEEP DANCIN' ON MY OWN, BITCHES.

Numero cuatro, "Cry When You Get Older" is flat out flamboyant and camp to the max. The lyrics make me cringe, and I want with my entire self to dislike this song and move on. But, alas, well, excuses aside, Robyn is my kryptonite. So while her lyric writing may be equal to a 13-year old girl, her beats are sick and it's decent background music. At least it beats "Don't Fucking Tell Me What to Do," anyway. But actually, listening now, I'm kind of annoyed. This joint gets a 2/5. Next. . .

Then we come to "Dance Hall Queen," the first of the tracks to hit the interwebs a few months back. This isn't new to me, as I nearly pissed myself when a galpal forwarded me the link back when it leaked - but it's solid as hell. Produced by mixmaster to the stars of indie-dance power (i.e. Santigold, M.I.A.), Diplo himself can do no wrong (well, aside from major lazer, but that's a different blog post). Robyn does her best rasta dub spit, bragging that she still "Runs this thing like a dancehall queen - I really don't want no hassle," droppin' "boom-boom-boom's" left and right. It's kind of funny to imagine this pale Swedish sprite trying to be Jamaican, but whatever, she's got the club to their feet (or at least, again, my personal shower towel dance party). Verdict: 5/5 stars.

"Hang with Me" is Body Talk's "Eclipse." Simple, sad, bare - acoustic. Really, really, wimpy. Umm, it is what it is, but I don't want to feel bummed out because Robyn's beau isn't "doing her right" so can't "Hang with meeee," so uhhhh. I'd rather be dancing. If I'm PMSing and all tori amos/hey jupiter'd out, I guess this would be a decent substitute, but right now I'm all about boogying. I'll give this one a 3/5.

"Jag Vet En Dejlig Rosa" is the final track on this 7-track ep. I have no fucking clue what the hell she's talking about as I am A) a heterosexual grown woman and B) not Swedish. It's quiet, minimalistic and disappointing. Even if I could understand her childlike begging, I don't think I'd give a shit. This is worse (and booooooring) than "Don't Fucking Tell Me What to Do." This gets a .5/5. Sick.

So I guess, this ep kinda blows when I look at it. There are a handful of stellar dance jams, "Dancing on My Own," "Dancehall Queen," "Fembot" (sorta, anyway). And these are what makes Robyn rule. But the rest is mere filler and a total boner killer. Here's to hoping Body Talk Pt 2/3 are less menstrualistic and that her P4K performance this summer will be packed full of her self-titled material. I will never get sick of "Be Mine!", "Konichiwa Bitches" or "Show Me Love." EVER.

OMG. LIFE CHANGING EVENT!!!

(but not mine).

my bff and her boo are in the hospital right now. they're gonna be parents within the - let's see here, 19 hours? (5 hours ago it was within 24 hrs).  she's a month early. but is healthy. i guess that bebe is a big boi and is ready to come on out!

i almost lost it on the bus. nearly burst into a big ole bath of tears. but i didn't. i guess i got a little emotional. it's like, time to grow up! and omgomgomg i love tessa hernandez so much i can't stand it. and she's a gonna be a mama. very, very soon. (like, a really really good mama).

i don't think i want kids. so this is pretty much the equivalent to me giving birth (kinda a big deal). i will be this child's fairy hipmother. teach it cool shit. give it fake tattoos. that kinda stuff.

so baby johnson, lil tessa, lil baby boo. i heart you lots.

guess i'll be making that return trip to minneapolis a lot sooner than i originally thought.

ramble city, take 1,003

i am excited and optimistic, gang. after 2+ months of unemployment, i finally feel like i'm on the right track. no jobby job just yet, but i feel as if i'm in the right direction of meeting the right people.

tomorrow i start my first day on my internship with the congress theatre. probs just doing promotions stuff, distributing flyers, posters, whatnot. i think i'll be in charge of the theater's facebook page and assisting with random tasks but the dude i'm meeting with tomorrow told me that there are opportunities to work for cash here and there either at merch tables or box office, etc. this is kinda what i've been wanting to do forever, so i'm excited.

i also got an additional last minute assignment for one of the new sites i'm writing for in addition to 3 assignments in the bag for the mag connection. meaning: sorry, detectives benson and stabler, i gots sum werds to write and sum peeps to meet. a reason to change outta my jammies before 3:00 pm.

wish me luck, dudes. (although i doubt i'll need it).

nostalgia trippin' on sum teenage shit :: rock on with your frock on

what a day, ya'll. i watched  more consecutive episodes of "16  & Pregnant" on MTV tonight than i'd like to admit.  made me realize, dayumn. i'm glad i didn't get knocked up at 16. and dayumn, i'm glad i ain't knocked up now at 26.  i asked  baby meeks if she would like to get knocked up and i could videotape her journey in a mini-series and we could call it 23 & Pregnant. She agreed, so now i gots to go her some dick.  orrrrrr not.

but seriously, mtv, wtf. i haven't watched that network in a hella long time and for good reason. got me thinkin bout when i was in jr. high/high school when my fave show on ANY channel was 120 Minutes on MTV on Sunday nights, 11 pm - 1:00 am. Bloated, bald, pretentious dorky and overweight Matt Pinfield taught me more about music and perhaps is whom I will forever be indebted too with my passion for worthless trivial music facts forever on that show. I was the hippest girl in Argyle, (population 789 what what), although none of my friends realized it. I was the lone NON-dixie chicks fan. Fuck this fishing in the dark nonsense. Metallica can suck my diyeeeeeck.

Naw, fatty matty taught me all the essentials in alterna-rock that was worth knowing in the mid-to-late nineties. dandy warhols. blur! blink 182 (well, at least during the dude ranch days). smashing pumpkins. bush. veruca salt. stone temple pilots. charlottan uks. fiona apple. tori amos. beastie boys. whatever, you get the picture. thinking now, it'd be hipster alternative galore. i'd like to think a modern day 120 minutes would look something like: beach house. gorillaz. lcd soundsystem. wolf parade. of montreal. matt and kim. passion pit. bon iver. spoon. yeah yeah yeahs. etc, etc. instead - mtv of course quit playing music videos years ago. if you're up around 3:30-4:30 am on a tuesday morning, you might catch a glimpse of da justin beibs or maybe some shiteous chris brown noise, but even that is few and far between.

i did notice that mtv has dedicated an entire new channel to vids, called MTVJ which - you guessed it, plays strictly mtv JAMS. fucking bogus, dudes. don't we already got BET for that shit? i watched about an hour of it after getting bored with insane clown posse's "miracles" (how the fuck DO magnets work??) and justin bieber ft. ludacris's "baby" (homey is soooooo not rocking bowling shoes on the bowling lane dance off montage, WTF!!) on repeat for about an hour and a half (i WISH i was embellishing). i saw one video worth watching and that was outkast's "miss jackson" which was a pleasant blast from the past, but other than that it's all hot baby girls with fine ass curves shakin to some generic ass booty jams. apparently, the new cool hip hop slang/gesture when you see a hot ass booty is to bite your finger and wince. yep. i know that'd get me to go home with some homie. dayumn! what's that you say? my curves are kickin? well they must be if you bit yo finga. hell yeah i'll spread em for you.

sick. sick. siiiiiiick.

i miss matt pinfield. i miss alternative music from the 90's. i felt sick watching these 16 year old girls get exploited with premature marriage proposals and baby drama.

so instead i dug throughout other past teen shit. browsing my google reader posts, i saw stereogum posted a link to the new blur track. at age 14 i was OBSESSED with damon albarn and his britpop flavorage in blur. song 2 may have been the beginning (shoved down my throat from my older bro PRE-120 Minutes, apparently atlanta had a cooler music exposure scene than hickass wisconsin villages), but i've been in lurv mostly with anything this dude has touched since then (minus the new gorillaz and his weird mali music africa project and that shiteous monkey opera crap). anyway. yeah. if you ever liked blur, you should LEGALLY download their new single that was on their record store day 7 inch, here: http://www.blur.co.uk/ All you gots to do is plug in an email address and boom. free download. i luv blur.

I also used to have an undying obsession for wearing oversized band t-shirts ordered from catalogs back in 8th grade. most of the shit in there was metal garbage and an abundance of sublime t's, but my friend jamie was always quick to point out if he spotted a garbage or veruca salt t. it didn't matter that i weighed approximately 80 pounds until 10th grade, i still never hesitated to rock a men's XL t. around 12th grade i got embarassed and tossed them all out, but i did manage to preserve a particularly ridic shirt, an oversized veruca salt shirt for the "8 arms to hold you" album. the back reads "rock on with your frock on". yap. i didn't get it then. and i still don't. but it's still pretty badass. so while i was checking all my old teenage alterna-jams, i decided it was time to yank it off the hanger and rock it to bed. i'm proudly rocking out with my frock on as i type this. sidenote: i totally lost the air guitar competition in 9th grade when me and 3 other pals did our best faux rendition to v. salt's "volcano girls," complete with black feather boas, rainbow striped camisole, baggy jeans and lava lamps. instead, some dude creamed us with his fishing pole, fishing hat, and you guessed it, "me and you goin fishin in the dark." fucker.


i feel my rambling needs to cease now. i have a stack of high school fave flicks sitting atop my dvd player. clueless, breakfast club and pretty in pink. sometimes, i wish i was 16 again. but then again, not really - i'm pretty sure justin bieber wasn't even born yet. so maybe being 26 and preying on 16 year olds is much, much better.

summer soundtrackin' :: tanlines

pre-sxsw, i had downloaded a link to the new tanlines ep. listened to it for about 6 seconds and was like, meh. never again really thought about it. i'm pretty sure i heard them dj'ing at the fader fort one day, but wasn't exactly sure. checking it now, though, and i gotta say while it's not the most original (or even remotely original) thing, the overall style/sound is pretty perfect for a chillaxing summer day. think ideal summer porch party/bbq. if major lazer and el guincho got together and threw it down, you'd end up with something sounding awfully similar to tanlines. big dance dub beats, tropical flavor, casiokeyboard-esque synth beats, it's all very simple instrumentation but still shamelessly fun. check it out for the perfect chill summer jam soundtrack.

MURS :: The Interview

Who'da thought little Jodi Root from Argyle Wisconsin would be chatting up legendary LA indie hip hop artist MURS on the same day his album drops. (Not me, probably not my old english professor Mr. duVair, either). But I did. And while I was a bit intimidated (or suffering massive caffeine overload), I managed to pull off my second phone interview for Chicago Innerview earlier this week. Gots to love my McGyver handheld video cam/speaker phone combo, here's the entire conversation transcription - the official Innerview version is much more condensed to 600 wordcount and cleaned up quite a bit, but in case any ya'll wanna read my nerdy questions and his abrupt "I'm tired of doing phone interviews whos is this nervous little girl I'm talking to" answers, you can check it below. MURS was totally polite, well spoken and you can tell there's a reason peeps is voting him president.
_______________________________________________________

When asked if he was nervous or excited for the official drop of his new album, Los Angeles indie hip hop leader MURS just laughed. Sounding incredibly cool and collected, he explained “Nah, I’m pretty calm.” I suppose when your philosophy is to Making the Universe Recognize and Submit, you’ve got much more on your plate than silly nerves. (Murs headlines Lincoln Hall on May 12th)

Congratulations on the album release! Fornever officially hits record store shelves today, (April 13), are you pretty excited? Do you get pre-release jitters or anything like that? Have you been busy making all sorts of other press calls today?


Nah, nah, no pre-release jitters, I’m pretty calm. Yes that’s what today’s been all about, (press calls).

Would you mind describing the recording process of the new record? Since you’re based out of LA and 9th Wonder North Carolina, do you two actually meet and record together or do you send a lot of your work through the internet for production?

Yeah we always only do it face to face, a lot of quality time together, no phony audio, we only do real talk, reality TV. (recording process) We’ve done the past two records in North Carolina with this record we did it in Los Angeles for the first time. it went really well, I thought, I felt really comfortable for once, usually I have to bring a lot of my LA energy to the east coast with me but this time it was a lot more organic, it’s like being at home, you can kick your feet off, walk around with your shirt off that type a thing.

You do a cover/tribute of Common’s “Used to Love H.E.R” and re-release of 9th Wonder’s original remix on the new album. Are there any other artists you’d like to cover or re-work in the future? Or would you ever re-work some other past works of your own with other partners? 

Oh yeah, I got lots of covers coming up, I hope everyone’s receptive to it and enjoys it but I think that’s something that hasn’t been done enough in hip hop so I’m happy to do it. Instead of just incorporating lines from other records, you know, I’d rather just do it just adjust it by covering it. You can definitely look for it, hopefully one cover an album from now. Marky Mark, Queen Latifah, the Bangles, Rancid – I’m all over the place.

Are there any artists you’d like to hear cover some of your material?

I would love it, it’d be weird, I don’t know if any of my – I’d love; I never even thought of this, spur of the moment, impossible one – Frank Sinatra. I would love for Kid Rock to cover Road is my Religion.

What’s your favorite track on the new record?

Vicky Veil – wife was there when recording song, (asks wife) did you like it then? (pauses) No, (asks wife)do you like it now? (pauses, laughs) No; it was my favorite beat when he first played it. We did it and we needed someone to sing and the guy who engineered the record, I never knew he could sing sing, you know he sang like I used to love her and then he came out of nowhere and was like ok I’ll go do it and he sounded amazing to me, it filled up the, like, it was crazy because I didn’t think the song was, I thought the beat was good but I didn’t think it could be what he took it to so I think that’s why I love it, not so much the subject matter, umm,

So much has changed in the scene from the early/mid nineties to now from when you started in the rap game, how would you say the difference in the genre has influenced your personal style?

I don’t know that it’s influenced me at all, I think the genre has definitely changed and I fortunately and unfortunately at this point in my career am the same, you know, I do what I do, I can’t start doing auto tune, I’ve tried. My jeans have gotten a little bit slimmer, you know, but I think that’s a good thing because of all the bullshit I used to be able to fit in my pockets. I also think the independent scene has changed my lifestyle, being underground and independent like this genre or a stable genre with the help of Atmosphere, Tech 9, Brother Ali we’ve created our own little world with a lot of diversity but there’s a common work ethic and that didn’t exist in hip hop ten years ago and we solidified it and we made respectable - I mean, Ice Cube has to know who I am, Rick Ross has to know who I am, or they’re uninformed, it’s not like, oh who cares, like, they all know who tech 9 is and some of them are actually using our business model and read our interviews so I think that’s changed.

I’m proud to be indie, I’m proud to be underground and I’m proud to be Murs and I think it makes Murs fans a lot more proud they don’t have to feel like, oh I listen to obscure – you know, when I listened to underground rap background, it was all obscure and no one heard of it. but now these kids are able to say, oh I see atmosphere on TV along with Nikki Manaj and Lil Wayne, or there’s Murs on MTV along with Drake and all these other people so I think it’s a lot more, it helps me encourage me to stay myself – back to the original question.

As the leader of LA’s underground hip hop scene, are there any other cities you’ve felt a connection with?

I love going everywhere but I think I’m more surprised with like, Omaha Nebraska. People show up in small town that you don’t think you’d have anybody in, but they turn out to be the best shows.

I’ve read in interviews that you are huge with having creative control in your work. Yet, your last few projects were collaborative efforts with Slug/Felt and now 9th Wonder. Your newest release, Fornever, hosts a wide array of featured artists including Kurrupt, Verbs and 9thmatic. How does the addition of artistic counterparts, specifically the reoccurring projects with slug and 9th wonder, contribute to the creative process?

I def love creative control, that’s why my fans are like Murs for President. so whether, but I give so much creative control to slug and the producer, like this time Aesop Rock and 9th Wonder, and every few years I have to do something like the my regular end to the beginning like Murs Rules the World or Murs for President was just beats I pick and I do whatever the hell I want b/c doing these collaborative projects, I don’t really get to steer the ship and that’s because I want to do a project, I don’t want to argue a bunch of times, I just want to sit back and learn – I think I have a lot to learn from slug, I learned a lot from Aesop rock, so I feel like a better rapper. Slug has consistently helped me refine my skills, refine my work ethic, refine my opinions on life and he’s helped me so much. The same thing with 9th wonder, I learned so much by allowing myself to be shaped or controlled or manipulated or however you wanna put it, by letting myself be experienced in having a captain on the ship – if you don’t have a driver, we both can’t take the ship where we want to, but if I go on your journey I can learn from you and that’s how a lot of my business relationships are. I try to learn as much as I could and be a team player and if you’ve never been a team player, you can’t be on a team and I think rap is full of so many leaders who have never been willing to be a part of a team.

What are some artists that you think our readers should check out?

There’s this kid from the west coast, Don Kennedy and Nocando, all the featured artists on my records like verbs – (what have I heard recently that’s really good?) anything by Doomtree I think is really really good and that’s just rap. As far as punk rock goes, I think you should check out whole wheat bread, they’re really awesome.

I’ve read that MURS has a variety of meanings in its acronym, which one has the most meaning for you?

(Pause) I don’t know, I guess the first one making universe recognize and submit, it tickles me so that’s probably my favorite one. I have a shirt with 35 or 36 of them on it.

I gotta say, I’m also a huge fan of your work in Felt - Just out of curiosity, where does the Inspiration for the Felt heroines stem? Lisa Bonet vs. Christina Ricci vs. Rosie Perez? Who’s next?

I think that’s the end of the trilogy, I don’t know if there’s going to be any more felt. Christina Ricci started off with, that’s how me and slug got to be as close of friends as we are now. I hope he considers me a friend, just kidding, but our journey to be coming good friends, families, almost, brothers, we both have made songs about Christina Ricci and we had this fascination with her so we finally decided we’re going to do a project together he wanted to name it felt and I said cool as long as we can call it a tribute to Christina Ricci and its kinda like you know, the first step to putting out two worlds together so then we were like we gotta do a tribute for this one and we didn’t know who we were gonna choose. And then I was really into Lenny Kravitz at the time and we were all talking to ant and we were like how amazing of a woman she got to be for him to write that song for her, you know (It’s not over until it’s over – wigging out, lord have mercy, couldn’t remember) But anyway we thought she was amazing so we were like, yeah she’s perfect and then the other one we came up with so long ago I don’t know how we came up with it but it just made sense. It’s all like b-list actresses that people haven’t heard from in a while, you know what I mean? Outside of the mainstream but people know who you are kinda thing.

summertime's a comin'

lots o new releases to get excited for summer soundtrackin'. or at least, lots-o-good singles, anyway. there's a handful of tracks i just can't get enough of. and since it looks like despite my efforts, the jobhunt may take a little longer than i originally anticipated, i may as well enjoy the sunshine and make the most of getting outdoors and have some fun.

here's the beats that make me hop around my apartment, singing at the top o' my lungs:

1. kate nash - do-wah-doo                                        

2. stars - fixed                                                           

3. tokyo police club - breakneck speed                      

4. big boi - shutterbug                                               

5. the bird and the bee - i heard it on the radio          

6. goldfrapp - rocket

7. little boots - new in town

8. lcd soundsystem - drunk girls

9. peter wolf crier - crutch and cane

10. phantogram - when i'm small

and of course, any new robyn as it leaks (which has been frequently - new album in june, yippee!! AND she's gonna represent at p4k!! JOE D DANCE PARTEEE!) and as always, modest mouse - good news for people who love bad news is my timeless forever infinity summer album.

music makes me happy.

chat roulette is totally creepy.

so i've heard bits and blurbs about this new chatting concept called chat roulette. i guess really it's just the same thing as the dated ICQ or yahoo chat days back when i was in junior high and chatting was the hip new thing (on dial-up). i was too poor to have a computer, so i'd have to save my chatting dates until i'd have sleep overs at my fellow 7th grade girls' houses. the spin with roulette is 1) there's a webcam/mic involved, so now you can see a/s/l vs. transcribing and lying your little ass off. there is an option to participate sans a webcam, however if you do you're much more likely to get "nexted" which is point numero 2) it's a split screen so you can see your cam and the other participants cam, the whole chatting sesh is random, ala roulette, and you can either decide to chat or click "next" until you find your ideal chatter.

now, two things made me really wanna try this. 1) my friend told me she totally saw the jonas bros on her screen, but she got so confused and overwhelmed she just shut her laptop off instead of partaking in conversation - so OBVIOUSLY, my main initiative in giving this new internet creepdom a whirl was my feeble attempts at stalking any tween sensation, (preferrably jo bros, but after consuming several leinenkugel's and absolut punch contraptions, i settled on justin bieber). and 2) everyone i know who's done it says there's just penises everywhere. now, i do not care to see penises, strange or otherwise, but the concept of random dudes just wagging their dicks into cameras, for anyone to criticize in a microphone or to see their horrified facial expressions, or in my case, type obscene criticisms, (DO I SEE A SORE?? NICE DRIED CUM STAINS! THERE'S DRIED UP TOILET PAPER IN YOUR ASS!!). unfortunately, the penis trend is true. 7/10 cams were of dudes wagging their weiners around. i really, really hope it was because it was 2:30 am on a saturday night. otherwise, the youth of chatting culture will be much more disturbed than what we went through. no A/S/L? but, DICK DICK DICK.

if it wasn't penises, it was 14 year old boys asking to see our boobs. (i was chatting with a girlfriend, thank god, otherwise i would have felt like the world's biggest creep/victim/gross out). we had some fun with the little kids, promising to show our boobs if they could get justin bieber to show up on their webcam to ask us; asking them if they knew justin bieber personally and to swoop their hair like his to get chicks. a lot of, 'JUSTIN BIEBER 4 LYFE!!!' or 'YOU KNOW DA BIEBS? HE DA BEST!" quinn thought i was weird at first but then she also got the bieber fever. sidenote: i have never heard a single song of his, although i do know he's luda's protege and usher bought him a range rover for his 16th birthday. he was not only signed by luda, but also does a song with him. he has swoopy bangs and is from canada. DA BIEBS.

unfortunately, as many little boy BOOBIE requests and old gross penises we did have to horrificly NEXT through as quickly as possible through, quinn and i definitely successfully drunkenly amused ourselves for about an hour and a half. but then thinking back on it, i'm pretty floored and terrified that this is becoming such a huge phenomen. i would never want any of my brother's kids (OR ANY KIDS) to see this shit. if i ever caught a sick little 13 year old boy requesting my niece to lift her shirt or wag his piss stick, i would call up detectives benson and stabler stat and get those damn pervs locked up in SVU before i could dropkick the little fuckers. it scares me, and i'm all about fun new things. but where is all the outrage from the overprotected parents? i have heard barely any outrage/conflict from the news outlets and there is absolutely zero filter on the penis shots.i guess this is why i don't have children, so instead, i can harass them rather than worry about my own. 

meh. i did find out, though, the best ammunition is the biebs. see a wang? caps lock that JUSTIN BIEBER NOISE and that shit will go flacid faster than you can say grandma.

Love is ALL

My mind was successfully blown on Tuesday night when I made a last minute decision to make the trek down Western and shell out the fifteen bones to check my Swedish flavor of the week obsession, the eccentricly delectable pop outfit, Love is All. Following a few $2 pints of PBR round the corner at Rainbo, my lovely partner in crime for the evening, Juliet, and I found ourselves a spot at the end of the bar just in time to check the opening group (which blew chunks quite hard, to be frank - loud garage thrashcore is dead, for a reason).

Enough beers and time (and a quarter Ms. Pacman machine), can make anything tolerable, however - yet we were all about moving up front and getting stoked when the energetic, fresh-faced five person outfit took the stage. Two things caught my eye in particular - 1) the typical crowded Empty Bottle was maybe 1/3 - 1/4 full to capacity, which really shocked me seeing how much blogosphere attention this troupe has been gathering since their debut dropped five years past. While I've been sold from the get go when they released their initial release, Nine Times That Same Song, they managed to keep me a loyal fan throughout the years with 1,000 Things Keep Me Up At Night and the recent March release, 2wo Thousand and Ten Injuries. I've read countless praise on their live performances and was astounded that I was one of maybe 60 to show up. 2) 95% of those that were in the audience were male. I guess the gays are suckers for quirky fun dance pop. But jesus, I figured there'd have to be some pretentious indie girls in the scene, but I guess not.

Whatever, dudes. From the moment this group kicked it off with 2010 Injuries' "Bigger, Bolder," I was lost in an internal dance frenzy. The sound was loud, clammoring and full of fun - authentic beats. No synthesizers or drum machines. Just guitars, bass, drumkit, a sax player and the infinity adorableness of leadsinger, Josephine Olausson and her yelp/shriek childlike vocals. Smiling humbly, she announced how "very happy they were to be back in Chicago," and I'm pretty sure I singled out a few relatives of the band, an older gentleman with a white handlebar mustache Colonel Sanders would envy, a frumpy yet determined older female counterpart, and an uncle/cousin with non-stop rocking/swaying dance moves in a mean pair of birkenstocks and cargo shorts. I kinda wished they were my family.

Keeping the music flowing, next up was their debut releases' "Talk Talk Talk," and then a cover of the 80's hit, "Mexican Radio," which was particularly a drunken and astounding pleasure for yours truly. Olaussen, sweetly chirping in her childlike demeanor introduced the next track, " This next song could be about any other day than today, because we slept in, maybe about you because you might have had to wake up early for work, but not me. And tomorrow neither, because I'm only going to Champaign," giggling, she set the mic in its stand and the band broke out into 2010 Injuries' shitty morning anthem, "Early Warnings."

This must have been when I noticed all the dancing gents surrounding me, b/c in my drunken scribble of notes I managed to decipher the side bullet, "sausagefest." Innnnneresting. "Wishing Well," from 08's 1000 Things Keep me Up At Night, and I again, danced my little girly ass off in my best Molly Ringwald/Ally Sheedy Breakfast Club fast feet dance moves possible. More fun dancey beats folllowed, but I quit keeping such accuate notes. I remember an equal representation of all 3 records, and cameos from "Make Out, Fall Up," "Kungeon," "New Beginnings" and lots of dancing, smiling. Kinda wished "Rumors" would have made an appearance, but I survived.

Post-show, the members of the group were all about mingling with the few fans, graciously thanking them for showing up and taking pictures. I picked up a band cargo tote bag with the band name slapped on it, above a pic of a tomato. "This is awesome," I told Josephine. She smiled, "Thank you ever so much, I made these in my kitchen in Sweden." Total sweetness, pop purity and awesomeness. Chicago, you missed out on a spectacular show. Don't let it happen again.

Just Another Day on the Beach

Before I even stepped foot into the Metro last evening, I knew something special was going to take place. Teen Dream, the latest release by indie dream-pop outfit Beach House, has held my iPod and listening pleasure hostage since its release this past January—making little room for any additional competition. Both excited and nervous that my long anticipated personal experience with their live performance may either blow me away or underwhelm, I soon learned that I had absolutely nothing to worry about.


I was a mere one of many eager fans in the crammed, sold-out house, stilling anxiously when Beach House kicked their hour long set off at 10:15 sharp. The stage was decked in a display of large, suspended, glittery foiled diamond shapes, which majestically twirled and shimmered amidst the various red, violet, fuchsia, golden, green and blue illuminated hues. The setup itself posed the ideal backdrop of a dream sequence – which is exactly what seemed to unfold as the trio of musicians took the stage and opened the night up with the blissful and lazy “Walk in the Park.”

Victoria Legrand’s seemingly effortless vocal magic transcended on a level which should be humanly impossible. The translation from recorded album to the stage is eerily dead-on, if not even more raw and guttural, yet soothing and mesmerizing. Legrand’s overall stage presence was in itself something to be awed; backed up with enchanting organ work, she seemed subdued, swaying, while other times head banging and hopping – the woman proved herself as an incredible front woman. That’s not to say that guitarist Alex Scally did not hold his own as well. Without his sheer instrumentation and musicianship, the musical equation that took hold last evening would not have been possible. Combined with his guitar skills, keys and the addition of a touring percussionist, the experience would not have nearly had the full throttle it held.

The entirety of Teen Dream was accounted for, in addition to a handful of other older favorites to the crowd’s pleasure. The 60-odd minutes that Beach House took over the Metro passed exactly as it should have – dreamily, trancelike, quickly and unreal. No words, descriptors or review can do proper justice to witnessing such magical and thunderous peaks of seasickness and musical otherworldliness as such highlights as “Zebra,” “Silver Soul” or “Norway” live. At no point did I feel a sense of who or where I was, or what I was doing there—it was a beautiful hypnotic sequence, pure and simple. Majesty unfolded and pure musicianship prevailed. Last night was one dream I did not want to wake up from.

The Ruby Suns Cast their Rays on Chicago

The final day of March in Chicago marked the first (non-official) day of summer – at least it seemed to, with its cloudless, sunny skies and 70 degree temperature. Skipping over to Schubas, the summeresque vibe transitioned into an almost Caribbean like flavor, when Sub Pop’s electronic darling trio The Ruby Suns took to the stage. Headlining a night of ambient and refreshing digital beats, The Ruby Suns kicked their set off around the 10:15 mark, following a set by Toro y Moi. Layers of synthetic samples, rounds of percussion (sometimes attacked by all 3 members simultaneously), and cool, echoic vocal harmonies set the foundation of an hour long journey into the ideal soundtrack for the perfect, chill summer evening.


Following the trends set forth by electro-indie outfits Animal Collective and El Guincho, The Ruby Suns kept their digital collage of melodies flowing from sounds of upbeat pop to darkened safari and somewhere mysterious in between, all with a dancey backbeat. With a $3 Jim Bean concoction in my hand, I found myself taken by the charm and trance like rhythms casting from the small, violet, fuchsia and gold illuminated stage. The small, yet condensed audience seemed to eat it up, swaying their bodies in the tight crowd, swigging back cocktails and applauding their appreciation—especially after front man Ryan McPhun confided his infatuation with spring break. Between the floral decked out drum kit, gentle vocal harmonies, tinkering chimes, thunderous synth work and electro guitar, there was no denying that Chicago had finally concluded its notorious annual cold spell known as winter. Thanks are due, of course, to the Ruby Suns for casting their mesmerizing melodic rays.

Cemetary Sun Bathin'

No, for realz. Today was a fantastic day. I woke up early, made myself a big delicious mushroom/cheese omelette with bacon and an english muffin. Downed a pot of dark roast. Went on a lengthy stroll with Ashley to the Rosehill Cemetary. Finished off the last 40 pages of my book assignment. Laid, chilled, relaxed in the sunshine. There's something about cemetaries that just put me at ease. They're so beautiful and serene. Perfect destination to quiet the unruly ruckus in my head. Destress. Just, be me and be at peace. Strolled through the paths, sat by the water. Grabbed a late lunch at Hamburger Mary's. Toured the streets of Andersonville. Returned home for more caffeine and to complete my assignment on my porch, enjoy the sunshine and unseasonal warmth.

Finished my assignment, I think. I need someone with some sort of journalistic or english background to review and give me an A-OK before I feel comfortable submitting to my editor. First magazine piece, kind of sorta very for realzies intimidating. Got a text from a friend's ex-boyfriend earlier, "dude i read some of your shit on hype machine today, good job!" Then got a friend request on both twitter and facebook from the singer of a band i previewed for chicago innerview. Small shit, but damn. Didn't even know people read my ramblings. So it's kinda sorta awesome and flattering that people dig it. Makes me feel like not a complete loser, anyway.

Now I'm just relaxing, well, sort of. I've got 2.5 hours til it's time to head to Metro to check what I hope to be my show of the year. Beach House will be pretty incredible, me hopes. Then off for some brews potentially. See the fam tomorrow. Write my review. Friend from college will be in town tomorrow eve. Possibly check another show. Write. Write. Write. Sunday work on my PWC review. Maybe grab easter brunch with some friends.

Oh, the life of me. Unemployed. Confused. Yet sometimes (and this is only sometimes), content. Today's one of them days.

progress report

so it's day 43 in the life of an unemployed late 20-something corporate something or another.

what's new? still apathetic and lazy in my job hunt. not really motivated - ESPECIALLY when it's 80+ degrees outside and the sun's shining. friends on the porch. bottles of wine in the park. playing catch and sketching shit. why on earth would i want to trade my unemployment wages of doing nothing for a lesser wage being miserable and being locked up in a cubicle? i wouldn't. hence, my lethargic ways.

i've got a headache right now. laying in my bed with the fan on high. windows open, listening to my neighbor bro-dude chatting on his iphone. not wanting to read my latest assignment, a 170 pager entitled "america and the pill," about as gripping as it sounds, kids. deadline's technically tomorrow but my editor pushed it back til sunday afternoon. lots of shit to get done between now and then, but i'll manage. tomorrow's the beach house show, goin solo on account of it being sold out, but i know a handful of random acquaintances who'll be in attendance so i'll more than likely make the best of it. or just be blown away by awesomeness.

beach house makes me pretty darned happy. or something, anyway. i'm really looking forward to it.

saturday will be review day and then maybe a museum trip with the family? i kinda hope they head into the city so i don't feel burdened with guilt for skipping easter trip to suburbia on sunday. think i'll eat at a friend's instead, wrap up my analysis on contraception. HARD. CORE. it'll read something like this: "i like birth control. it helps me not procreate. birth control is awesome, yet a catch 22, because if my mom had health insurance, i would not be here. she was not on birth control. but i'm glad i get to take those pills. because not only do they regulate my baby making parts, but it also looks badass in that little plastic case. hurray for baby killer pills." we'll see how many more assignments then get tossed my way. i have to actually sign a contract today, for that assignment and also my peter wolf crier review.

it's weird, getting assignments. in publications/sites people have a tendency to actually frequent. not hating on muzzle of bees, i know peeps read them words too, but spreading the jodi root brand is quite the unexpected task. i was pretty taken back when i checked chicago innerview's site today to find all 4 of my pieces are headlined on the front page. the top previews, even. fist pump for me. *shaking sadly. (oh goddamn neighbor, please silence your voice.)

well. i guess it's time to hit my homework. if you wanna read my shit and see how i'm a baller of sorts, you can check it hurr. (i did the miike snow preview - to which i have an extra ticket now for their show monday, so let me know if you wanna be my date so im not a loser going to two shows in a row by myself; and lasers and fast and shit; those darlins and the hot chip interview on the bottom).

and that's all she wrote. time to read up on some contraceptive noize.