nostalgia trippin' on sum teenage shit :: rock on with your frock on

what a day, ya'll. i watched  more consecutive episodes of "16  & Pregnant" on MTV tonight than i'd like to admit.  made me realize, dayumn. i'm glad i didn't get knocked up at 16. and dayumn, i'm glad i ain't knocked up now at 26.  i asked  baby meeks if she would like to get knocked up and i could videotape her journey in a mini-series and we could call it 23 & Pregnant. She agreed, so now i gots to go her some dick.  orrrrrr not.

but seriously, mtv, wtf. i haven't watched that network in a hella long time and for good reason. got me thinkin bout when i was in jr. high/high school when my fave show on ANY channel was 120 Minutes on MTV on Sunday nights, 11 pm - 1:00 am. Bloated, bald, pretentious dorky and overweight Matt Pinfield taught me more about music and perhaps is whom I will forever be indebted too with my passion for worthless trivial music facts forever on that show. I was the hippest girl in Argyle, (population 789 what what), although none of my friends realized it. I was the lone NON-dixie chicks fan. Fuck this fishing in the dark nonsense. Metallica can suck my diyeeeeeck.

Naw, fatty matty taught me all the essentials in alterna-rock that was worth knowing in the mid-to-late nineties. dandy warhols. blur! blink 182 (well, at least during the dude ranch days). smashing pumpkins. bush. veruca salt. stone temple pilots. charlottan uks. fiona apple. tori amos. beastie boys. whatever, you get the picture. thinking now, it'd be hipster alternative galore. i'd like to think a modern day 120 minutes would look something like: beach house. gorillaz. lcd soundsystem. wolf parade. of montreal. matt and kim. passion pit. bon iver. spoon. yeah yeah yeahs. etc, etc. instead - mtv of course quit playing music videos years ago. if you're up around 3:30-4:30 am on a tuesday morning, you might catch a glimpse of da justin beibs or maybe some shiteous chris brown noise, but even that is few and far between.

i did notice that mtv has dedicated an entire new channel to vids, called MTVJ which - you guessed it, plays strictly mtv JAMS. fucking bogus, dudes. don't we already got BET for that shit? i watched about an hour of it after getting bored with insane clown posse's "miracles" (how the fuck DO magnets work??) and justin bieber ft. ludacris's "baby" (homey is soooooo not rocking bowling shoes on the bowling lane dance off montage, WTF!!) on repeat for about an hour and a half (i WISH i was embellishing). i saw one video worth watching and that was outkast's "miss jackson" which was a pleasant blast from the past, but other than that it's all hot baby girls with fine ass curves shakin to some generic ass booty jams. apparently, the new cool hip hop slang/gesture when you see a hot ass booty is to bite your finger and wince. yep. i know that'd get me to go home with some homie. dayumn! what's that you say? my curves are kickin? well they must be if you bit yo finga. hell yeah i'll spread em for you.

sick. sick. siiiiiiick.

i miss matt pinfield. i miss alternative music from the 90's. i felt sick watching these 16 year old girls get exploited with premature marriage proposals and baby drama.

so instead i dug throughout other past teen shit. browsing my google reader posts, i saw stereogum posted a link to the new blur track. at age 14 i was OBSESSED with damon albarn and his britpop flavorage in blur. song 2 may have been the beginning (shoved down my throat from my older bro PRE-120 Minutes, apparently atlanta had a cooler music exposure scene than hickass wisconsin villages), but i've been in lurv mostly with anything this dude has touched since then (minus the new gorillaz and his weird mali music africa project and that shiteous monkey opera crap). anyway. yeah. if you ever liked blur, you should LEGALLY download their new single that was on their record store day 7 inch, here: http://www.blur.co.uk/ All you gots to do is plug in an email address and boom. free download. i luv blur.

I also used to have an undying obsession for wearing oversized band t-shirts ordered from catalogs back in 8th grade. most of the shit in there was metal garbage and an abundance of sublime t's, but my friend jamie was always quick to point out if he spotted a garbage or veruca salt t. it didn't matter that i weighed approximately 80 pounds until 10th grade, i still never hesitated to rock a men's XL t. around 12th grade i got embarassed and tossed them all out, but i did manage to preserve a particularly ridic shirt, an oversized veruca salt shirt for the "8 arms to hold you" album. the back reads "rock on with your frock on". yap. i didn't get it then. and i still don't. but it's still pretty badass. so while i was checking all my old teenage alterna-jams, i decided it was time to yank it off the hanger and rock it to bed. i'm proudly rocking out with my frock on as i type this. sidenote: i totally lost the air guitar competition in 9th grade when me and 3 other pals did our best faux rendition to v. salt's "volcano girls," complete with black feather boas, rainbow striped camisole, baggy jeans and lava lamps. instead, some dude creamed us with his fishing pole, fishing hat, and you guessed it, "me and you goin fishin in the dark." fucker.


i feel my rambling needs to cease now. i have a stack of high school fave flicks sitting atop my dvd player. clueless, breakfast club and pretty in pink. sometimes, i wish i was 16 again. but then again, not really - i'm pretty sure justin bieber wasn't even born yet. so maybe being 26 and preying on 16 year olds is much, much better.