men i want to date : jemaine clemont

god. for this particular gent i could post like 100 reasons why i wanna bone date him. hilarious, a geek, sexxxy, singer, aaagh. ok, so he's married too. but that can't stop a sister from rubbing one out to the idea of our holy matrimony can it? jemaine, we should totally get together and play that nintendo power pad track and field game sometime. it'd be totally aces.

reasons why i want to date jemaine clemont

1. glasses, duh
2. he'd buy me a kabab
3. if i was ever feeling self conscious, he'd be quick to assure me i'm the most beautiful girl in the room
4. i bet he's friends with aziz ansari.
5. even though our sizes are probably off a little bit, i'd still like to swap some of his clever animal t-shirts/western button-ups
6. he's like an ultra sexy younger jeff goldblum (is that possible? sexy and jeff goldblum in the same sentence? gross, right, but homeboy pulls it off)
7. awkward self-conscious boys are totally hot.
8. he'd probably give me a free copy of the 2nd season of flight of the conchords since i don't have it
9. our first names both start with j, so that'd be pretty adorbs if we were a couple, right?
10. i could finally throw away that crinkled magazine pic i've been jerking to the past year and a half and jerk to the real deal.